vovat: (Cracker)
[livejournal.com profile] bethje has remarked on occasion that the two of us are more best friends than anything else, which I guess is kind of true. When we'd only been dating for a few months, people compared us to an old married couple. I'm pretty much resigned to the fact that I'm not an exciting person to be with. I'm mostly just reliable, and I don't hear anyone saying that reliability is what they're looking for in a partner. I guess it's a good thing, but it isn't something anybody is really attracted to. I've always been clear that what I most desire in life is contentment, and I suppose I try to provide that as well. Is it weird for a married couple with an average age of thirty to be more close friends than anything else? Isn't that usually something that happens some time down the road?

What's kind of weird is that I'd wanted to get married for a while, yet I don't think marriage really has much meaning. Neither of us are religious, so we don't have the concern about being legitimately together in God's eyes. (And really, if I WERE religious, I doubt I'd think the Almighty would be that petty.) I wasn't really giving up my bachelorhood, because I'd never dated anyone else anyway. And for that matter, I don't even think marriage has to be about monogamy. I don't want to have an open relationship, but I don't really have a moral objection to the idea, either. It's more than I wouldn't want the complications (and I don't think anyone else would be interested in me anyway). It's more that I like being married because it means something to other people; saying "my wife" sounds more impressive than "my girlfriend," even if our situations were the same before and after the wedding. And, of course, there are the legal benefits of being married, like being able to share in my wife's health insurance. Honestly, I feel like giving special benefits to married couples is pretty ridiculous on the part of the government. I have to wonder if conservatives are so intent on preserving "traditional marriage" not just to pander to the Religious Right, but also because it saves money. If you can, for instance, limit the people with which someone can share health benefits to a spouse and children, that means less people for the insurance companies to cover.
vovat: (Default)
So, yes, I'm married now, and that's kind of weird. I mean, it hasn't impacted my daily routine so far, but it feels kind of strange to think about it. Wearing a wedding ring is also going to take some getting used to. The actual ceremony took place in a courthouse, presided over by the mayor. I was so nervous during it that I mixed up the rings, ending up with [livejournal.com profile] bethje's on my finger, and wondering why it didn't fit. That's the kind of thing I might be able to laugh about at some point in time, but now I'm still kind of embarrassed. Other people didn't have a problem with laughing during the ceremony. Also embarrassing is that I drove into a curb in the parking lot.

The dinner went off better, and while expensive, it didn't cost quite as much as we'd thought it would. I believe there were a grand total of forty-three people (counting the two of us) in attendance, although I'm not sure there was a time when all of them were there. I'd met everyone there before aside from my sister's boyfriend. For food, I had the Chicken Monterrey, which was very good, and the portion was pretty big. It was supposed to come with either rice or a potato, both of which I consider to be inferior grains. At my new mother-in-law's suggestion, I substituted a small bowl of spaghetti, because I'm really fussy. Hey, I think it's pretty good for me that I ate about half of my salad. The dessert provided by the restaurant was chocolate mousse, which I didn't eat. I did, however, have some of the wedding cake that Beth's uncle Harry made. There were several layers of chocolate with the one at the bottom being yellow; I, of course, ate from the bottom layer.

Anyway, I was nervous the whole time, but it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. I'd brought a book to read in case it just got to be too much, but I never needed to take it out of the car. Beth and I didn't walk around and greet everybody, but most of the guests came to us. I know some people are really bothered by being the center of attention, but I actually prefer that to being just another person in the crowd. I'm still nervous, but it gives me a certain sense of being more in control, even if it's a false sense.

I should have pictures up at some point, but I'm not sure when.
vovat: (Default)
I don't really have anything to say, but I figured I should make an entry anyway, seeing as how it's been a while since my last one. I went to the Olive Garden with [livejournal.com profile] bethje, Dorothea, my dad, and Barbara the other day. I had that lasagna with sausage that's currently on special. It was good, but the sausage was hotter than I thought it would be, and the ends of the pasta were kind of hard. Beth mentioned that she's gotten a little tired of the Olive Garden, and I think I would have to agree. I still like the bread, though. In fact, I brought some home, and I'm eating a piece right now.

I guess I'll wish everyone a happy Leap Day, and thank Julius Caesar for adding the extra day to February. Well, okay, I don't know that any thanking is really necessary, although the calendar would be really off without it. And hey, it makes an interesting day on which to do things, like, say, getting married. The ceremony will take place at 5 this evening, and we're going out to dinner afterwards at a restaurant called the Library. Pretty appropriate for a librarian, huh? {g} Personally, I would prefer getting a bunch of pizzas and playing board games, but I'm not sure how well that would go over with anyone else (or, for that matter, where we'd be able to do that).

June 2025

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