Young Marrieds

[vovat]

bethje has remarked on occasion that the two of us are more best friends than anything else, which I guess is kind of true. When we'd only been dating for a few months, people compared us to an old married couple. I'm pretty much resigned to the fact that I'm not an exciting person to be with. I'm mostly just reliable, and I don't hear anyone saying that reliability is what they're looking for in a partner. I guess it's a good thing, but it isn't something anybody is really attracted to. I've always been clear that what I most desire in life is contentment, and I suppose I try to provide that as well. Is it weird for a married couple with an average age of thirty to be more close friends than anything else? Isn't that usually something that happens some time down the road?

What's kind of weird is that I'd wanted to get married for a while, yet I don't think marriage really has much meaning. Neither of us are religious, so we don't have the concern about being legitimately together in God's eyes. (And really, if I WERE religious, I doubt I'd think the Almighty would be that petty.) I wasn't really giving up my bachelorhood, because I'd never dated anyone else anyway. And for that matter, I don't even think marriage has to be about monogamy. I don't want to have an open relationship, but I don't really have a moral objection to the idea, either. It's more than I wouldn't want the complications (and I don't think anyone else would be interested in me anyway). It's more that I like being married because it means something to other people; saying "my wife" sounds more impressive than "my girlfriend," even if our situations were the same before and after the wedding. And, of course, there are the legal benefits of being married, like being able to share in my wife's health insurance. Honestly, I feel like giving special benefits to married couples is pretty ridiculous on the part of the government. I have to wonder if conservatives are so intent on preserving "traditional marriage" not just to pander to the Religious Right, but also because it saves money. If you can, for instance, limit the people with which someone can share health benefits to a spouse and children, that means less people for the insurance companies to cover.