Listless Christmas Eve

[vovat]

Christmas in adulthood is always kind of disappointing. I just think back to how exciting it was when I was a kid, and how I can't recapture that feeling now. Part of it is because I'm terrible at finding gifts. bethje is about the only person I can shop for, and even she's getting a little more difficult. I don't have the money, and even if I did I wouldn't know what to get anybody. My family has always been difficult to shop for. This year, I probably won't be seeing my mom until after Christmas, so I have a little more time to shop. I wish more people would let me know what they wanted; I know that eliminates a fair amount of the element of surprise, but it's still fun to get things you want, right? At least that's how I feel, and I try to keep my Amazon wishlist updated as much as possible. Actually, I don't think giving gift cards is all that bad either. Some people argue that it would make just as much sense to give cash, but not really. Not from my perspective, anyway. If someone gives me cash, it's probably just going to go toward paying my bills, or possibly buying something at some point in the future when I no longer remember where they money came from. Not that I don't appreciate that, but you could say it isn't very Christmas-like. At least with a gift card, I have to get an actual present with it. I don't know. I guess there are pros and cons both ways, but it would be easier if people just came out and said what they wanted. Maybe some people genuinely don't want anything, though. All I know is that I never know what to get anybody, and I always end up feeling guilty, like I'm taking without giving. I think this whole idea of not knowing what anybody wants is part of why the holiday season is so hectic for so many people, to the point where some of claim to genuinely hate it. I certainly wouldn't go that far, but then, I don't have any kids. Although, really, kids are probably a lot easier to shop for than adults. I didn't even send out Christmas cards this year, although I guess I haven't for the past few years either. Maybe I'm self-centered, but I mostly just feel clueless, poor, and kind of sad. It's not that I don't still enjoy Christmas, just that it always seems like it could be better. Also, I'm terrible at wrapping.

Comments

[suegypt.livejournal.com]

You're not alone in your listing... however, maybe the problem is in expectation of gifts. If we sort of said to all at the beginning of the holiday, "let's just go out together and have a meal, and go to a movie together sometime soon, maybe that would be more personal and immediate. Give people gift cards for movies and restaurants. Screw the rest of the competition to get the right gift for everybody. It can't be done, eh?

Spend time with loved ones, and forget the rest. For instance, the time you have spent this year posting has been a bit of a gift to me, and i thank you for reaching out to me.

[vovat.livejournal.com]

Well, I enjoy the gift exchange when I really know a person and they know me. Otherwise it's kind of a hassle.

[rockinlibrarian.livejournal.com]

I second this response! Have yourself a merry little Christmas!*

*And yes, I AM referring ironically to your Christmas music post of the other day here.

[kevenn.livejournal.com]

I've felt a lot in recent years that Christmas just isn't magical any more. I think I need some kids to recapture that. I just can't afford to have kids. :/

Merry Christmas, Nathan. <3

[vovat.livejournal.com]

Thanks. I have to suspect that Christmas would be one of the few times of year when it would actually be fun to have kids.

[poisonyoulove.livejournal.com]

I'd enjoy Christmas a lot more if there weren't socially awkward gift exchanges.

[zimbra1006.livejournal.com]

I love giving and getting gifts, but do find it stressful sometimes. With my best friends or immediate family it's fine; with in-laws or mandatory gift giving (secret Santa, etc) I worry that they won't like what I got them or that my face will show I don't like something.

I think part of the problem with Christmas as an adult (not that it's really a problem) is most people have at least SOME money and if they really want something they buy it. When you were a kid Christmas was pretty much how you got stuff. And we probably all remember at least one year where we got the most perfect gift ever. It's hard to recapture that again, because a lot of people, if they want something with all their hearts, will just get it for themselves if they have an income.

There is also (at least in my family) this weird pressure of not wanting to get someone exactly what they asked for, because you want to show that you know them well enough to surprise them with something they will like but don't even know they want. That can easily backfire.

Obviously it's the thought that counts and all that. But sometimes the thought is stumped on what to get.

[vovat.livejournal.com]

Yeah, if I don't really know someone, I'd rather not get them anything and have them not get me anything. The problem with that is, even when you plan it out ahead of time, sometimes one of the people involved goes out and buys a present anyway.

[zimbra1006.livejournal.com]

I know what you mean! I try to keep a few emergency gifts on hand for such occasions.

[dragonxbait.livejournal.com]

Someone on my facebook said "Christmas is like finals week for parents". For Serious. I cannot believe how busy this month has been, despite that fact that we were aiming for a quiet, low key Christmas, with a minimal amount of commercialism. But aside from the chaos, I think kids make Christmas 100X better. This is probably the first Christmas season since I was a kid that felt exciting and "Christmasy" and I do think it is because I got to share it with my daughter, and we were creating new traditions as a family.

[colbyucb.livejournal.com]

Christmas in adulthood is always kind of disappointing. I just think back to how exciting it was when I was a kid, and how I can't recapture that feeling now.

It never really feels like Christmas anymore for me. I miss the magic. But it helps to see my cousins opening their gifts and getting all excited and stuff.