Licensed Games, Part 2: The Crappy and the Commercial

[vovat]

And finally, here's my long-promised second post on licensed video games. And by "licensed video games," I mean games that are based on movies, TV shows, and other non-game media and franchises. I assume the term is appropriate, since the copyright holders license the video games. Maybe there's a better term for this kind of game, though. Anyone have any ideas? Anyway, I'd meant to write this entry a few days ago, but I've been so tired recently.

Captain Planet - Based on Ted Turner's environmentally pandering superhero show (which I used to watch because it was the only thing on during early Saturday mornings). My brother and I rented this from the local drugstore, and weren't quite sure what to do. You play some stages in a plane and others as the Captain himself, and you can switch between the five elemental powers. We could never figure out exactly what some of the powers did, however. In the plane stages, Heart was just as useless as you would expect it to be.

Taz-Mania - In this Super NES game, the Tasmanian Devil runs around a racetrack eating kiwis, which then inexplicably pop back out of his mouth at the end of the level, making the whole thing a rather futile exercise to my mind. Even putting everything else aside, what about the cartoon suggested that a racetrack game would be a good idea? Did they just have this engine lying around from an unused racing game, and then said, "Eh, what the hell, let's just throw Taz into it"? I understand that the Genesis game based around this property is a more traditional side-scroller.

Where's Waldo? - Far be it from me to condemn a game based solely on graphics, but if the object is to locate something in a picture, shouldn't you be able to tell what you're looking at? There was another part to this game besides the traditional Waldo-finding, but when my brother borrowed this game sans instructions, I don't think he could figure out what you were actually supposed to do in that part.

Barney - I've never played this or seen it played, but bethje said she tried it once, and there's a part where Barney rides on a cloud. If you try to make him step off into the bottomless void beneath, he'll just say something like, "It's not time yet!" So the pleasure that I'm sure a great many gamers would get out of killing Barney is denied them.

Journey Escape - An Atari game Beth has, where you have to guide the members of the band Journey to a spaceship, while avoiding the crazed fans. You can become invincible when you touch something that looks like the Kool-Aid Man. I'm sure there are more games based on bands, but I can't think of any offhand. I remember reading about a Duran Duran board game, but I don't think they ever made the leap into the world of video games.

Cool Spot - Based around the short-lived 7-Up mascot, I don't remember this game being particularly bad, but I think games based around advertising campaigns are just kind of weird. I was trying to think of other commercial characters who had their own games, and McKids and Yo! Noid (neither of which I've actually seen first-hand) came to mind. There are also those Xbox games that Burger King recently sold featuring their own mascot, and I seem to recall hearing about games starring Chester Cheetah and the aforementioned Kool-Aid Man. Can anyone think of more?

Comments

[vilajunkie.livejournal.com]

When it comes down to it, wtf did the South American kid do with his Heart powers? Anything? I think his monkey was more helpful. And you know a show is going down the drain when they bring in a cute kid and/or an annoying animal sidekick. See Oliver in "The Brady Bunch" for reference.

I remember a PC game called Noidz, which had something to do with beating up the Noid(s) but I never played it because it never loaded for me. That or it was too confusing.

I had "The Lion King" and "Aladdin" on Sega Genesis. The former was too hard during the wildebeest stampede and the latter was too easy as you could press start and then ABAB continuously to skip to the next level. Which I did to see the ending of the game. Yeah, I'm a cheater. But I loved the old games where all you had to do was enter codes to beat the levels easier.

Ooh, I also had Monopoly as a Sega game. That was really odd.

[vovat.livejournal.com]

When it comes down to it, wtf did the South American kid do with his Heart powers?

I think he communicated with animals. Not like Dr. Dolittle or anything, just spiritually, or something like that. Why the writers decided that they should throw in "Heart" with the four classical elements isn't something I can figure out anyway. And they must have left out one of the continents as well, unless they weren't counting Europe and Asia as two separate ones. (Antarctica obviously wouldn't be included, as it doesn't have any human natives, but maybe they should have thrown in a penguin for good measure.) But if I remember correctly, the Wind girl wasn't said to come from either Europe or Asia, but simply from "the Soviet Union," which spanned both. If they had to put in a fifth element, I guess the most traditionally correct choice would have been Ether (and not the kind that puts people to sleep, although that would have actually been a pretty useful power).

I remember seeing some website several years ago that had a lot of little Java games based on commercials. There was something about collecting lost Levi's denim jeans, and "Keep the Corn Pops Away From Grandma."

I think the Super NES Aladdin had a few levels that other versions didn't, including one where you went inside the genie's lamp. According to the text before the stage, the genie invites Aladdin in. Since it's pretty easy to die in there, maybe that invitation was the genie's attempt to avoid having to grant any wishes.

[vilajunkie.livejournal.com]

There was a Fire guy from America, a Wind girl from the Sovier Union, an Earth guy from Africa (Kenya or Nigeria probably), and a Water girl from China. So they left out Australia. As usual. Yeah, Ether would have been a classical element, and Void is the tradtional Japanese fifth element. Void would be cool because you could send your enemies into oblivion.

MSN.com has all sorts of puzzle games and action games based on commercialized stuff. Just check it out at any given time and I guarantee there will be at least one game based on a movie, tv show, commercial, toy, or holiday.

Nope. Sega Aladdin had the level inside the Genie's lamp too. I think it was supposed to represent the song Genie sang in the movie "You Ain't Never Had a Friend Like Me". It was incredibly easy to die there. That was usually the last stage I could reach on my own skills. Only a third or less through the movie, but over halfway through the game.

[vovat.livejournal.com]

Maybe the Heart kid was originally on a team with more appropriate companions (Brains and Courage? Lungs, Liver, and Kidneys?), but he misplaced his companions and ended up with the Planeteers instead. And an Australian kid tried to join up, but Gaia didn't buy his argument that Beer counted as a classical element. :P

Yeah, Void would have been a much better power than Heart, but maybe it would have been deemed inappropriate for a kids' show to have people banishing their enemies from the world. On the other hand, I heard from someone who was into anime (possibly my brother) that, in English dubs, characters would die are said to have "gone to another dimension." So death is not okay, but eternal imprisonment in a formless void is fine, apparently.

I think the stage in the Aladdin game that was least related to the actual movie took place in a pyramid. I forget what the game's excuse was for Aladdin being there, but I'm pretty sure it had nothing to do with the "A Whole New World" sequence, which was the only time anyone in the film visited Egypt.

[vilajunkie.livejournal.com]

I AM CAPTAINNNN BOOODDDYYYY!!!! *g* Hey, Beer is an element. How else do you relieve a drought in Oz?

I like how blood is forbidden in rpgs, but sending enemies to hell using a mini Death is perfectly okay to show the kids. Oh, and enemies never decompose in video games, they just flash ten times and vanish, or else they turn into balls of light.

I don't remember that level. But on a related topic...I went to Disney World early this year and decided to look around the Life of Walt Disney exhibit. At the end, there was a display of what all the Disneylands around the world looked like. The one for Asia (Hong Kong? not the Tokyo one) was clearly based on Muslim temples and palaces, with the strange domed towers. So I said to my brother, "Look! Disneyland Asia looks just like Agrabah!" And so some punk kid (clearly between 18 and 22) that worked as "security" or whatever in the exhibit walked up to me and said "Nuh uh. Agrabah is in Africa and this is ASIA." I so wanted to point out to him that the story of Aladdin was based on 1001 Nights, which is based on Persian and Arabian mythology. Not only that, but the first song in Aladdin is "Arabian Nights". Arabia refers to Saudi Arabia, which is in Asia, not Africa. But I felt that if I said anything, I would be talking to a brick wall that probably got his info from the imagineers' training video. Because clearly Iraq and Iran, which are in Asia, are evil, so the only good Muslims are in Morocco, which also happens to be a country in the Epcot Lake of Countries.

[vovat.livejournal.com]

Oh, and enemies never decompose in video games, they just flash ten times and vanish, or else they turn into balls of light.

It must save a lot in burial costs, though. {g}

In the original Dragon Quest games for the FamiCom, dead party members would be represented by coffins. For the American translations, these were changed to ghosts, which really doesn't make any sense, as it's the body that would still be with the party.

The actual Arabian Nights version of "Aladdin" actually takes place in a Muslim sultanate in China. I understand, however, that the Disney version is largely based on the movie Thief of Bagdad, which I would imagine from the title is set in what would now be Iraq. No location was specified for Agrabah, but I got the impression it was supposed to be in present-day Saudi Arabia or thereabouts. I guess it's possible that it's in northern Africa, but I tend to doubt it. But then, Disney is never all that careful with historical or geographic accuracy.

[revme.livejournal.com]

There was a PC game based on the Spot -- it was basically Othello. My dad bought it for my mom a long, long time ago. Back when we had a 386, even.

Also, Heart is the lamest power EVER. It's basically mediocre powers of persuasion without having to actually talk or anything. Except, well, it doesn't work all the time. Hence, mediocre.

I liked the Atari game of Taz, though. (Way before Taz-Mania, though.) It was basically you were Taz (as a tornado), eating up food that came by, avoiding firecrackers. It was actually pretty neat.

[vovat.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I think I remember hearing about the Atari Taz game. Beth might have it, but I can't recall ever having played it.

[revme.livejournal.com]

I actually had the cart of it. The splash screen was a pretty decent drawing of Taz (non-tornado form).

[zimbra1006.livejournal.com]

I played the version for the Game Gear. I wonder if that was the same as the Genesis one. I think it was called Taz-Mania. Definitely a side-scroller. I just remember that in the first level you had to tornado through this long section being chased by a rock and if you didn't time it just right you got squished.

I also had the Ren and Stimpy game for Game Gear. I liked it, but not as much as the one for Super Nintendo, which involved a whole nerve ending level.

And I've played the Lion King game for Genesis. It is with no exaggeration one of the hardest and most frustrating games I've ever played. I have NEVER gotten to grow up from a cub.

[zimbra1006.livejournal.com]

oh and speaking of Disney movie games, I really like the Aladdin one. For both SNES and Genesis.

AND I just remembered 2 games I had -- Duck Dodgers in the 21 1/2 century, and Road Runner's Death Valley Rally. I LOVED the second one; I thought it was so fun. I was really into Looney Tunes though, which might have enhanced my enjoyment.

[vovat.livejournal.com]

What about Bugs Bunny's Crazy Castle?

[zimbra1006.livejournal.com]

I never played that one... oh, but there was some Tiny Toons game I liked too!

[vovat.livejournal.com]

I remember the NES Tiny Toons game, although the main thing that sticks out in my mind is how Duck Vader's spaceship would sometimes appear on the map screen, seemingly at random.

[vovat.livejournal.com]

I wonder whether the Genesis Lion King was the same as the Super NES one. I don't remember much about it, but I know the Super NES game had a stage based on "I Just Can't Wait To Be King" where Simba uses his really pathetic cub roar to scare animals into different positions. I think my brother made it up to the last stage on that one, but couldn't beat Scar.

[zimbra1006.livejournal.com]

haha, that sounds about right. There's one level where you have to use your wussy growl function to make the monkeys turn the other way so they can throw you. The puzzles aren't that difficult in the game, but I (and anyone I've seen play it) just physically could not get past a lot of the obstacles until about 500 tries. We were ultimately thwarted by the ape in the hakuna matata level.

[vilajunkie.livejournal.com]

Ugh! I never got past the wildebeest stampede. In the Genesis version, wasn't "I Just Can't Wait to Be King" a series of jumping on hippos and giraffes and avoiding the monkeys and crocodiles? Oh wait, you had to get swung by the monkeys. I just liked watching Simba get bored when I didn't press any buttons. Eventually he would chase after a moth. If you were at the edge of a cliff when you got him bored, he would jump to catch the moth and then fall into the cliff "accidentally". Fun times.

Don't you hate how few Genesis games were ever beatable? You really had to be a master in the olden days to beat a video game.

[science.livejournal.com]

Don't forget to include E.T., that thing practically killed Atari, and was made in 5 weeks.

[vovat.livejournal.com]

And it included commercialism, since E.T. had to collect Reese's Pieces!

I heard that a bunch of E.T. cartridges are buried somewhere under the desert in Arizona or thereabouts. Some future archaeologists are going to dig those up and wonder what was going on with our society.

[science.livejournal.com]

I forgot the band, but someone actually made a music video about digging up some E.T. carts. Hopefully if they dig them up they don't get a chance to play the game, for their sake.

[zimbra1006.livejournal.com]

I played that Cool Spot game. I also played the Chester Cheetah one for SNES, and believe it or not I liked Yo Noid. I even have the emulator of it.

[vovat.livejournal.com]

Did Yo Noid make the title character the protagonist? I assume it did, but that's a little weird, since he was always a villain in the commercials.

[zimbra1006.livejournal.com]

yes. You went around with your yo-yo hitting people with it. Then you would face off against some other, possibly similar character during the "boss" stages. I forget how that worked, but it involved throwing appropriate numbers of pizzas at each other.

[kristenjarrod.livejournal.com]

When one of my nephews left all his older sibling's old Nintendo games at our old house, I got hooked on playing that damn Waldo game during the Summer of 2003.

[vovat.livejournal.com]

Did you ever manage to find Waldo?

[kristenjarrod.livejournal.com]

Yup, every time.