I'm Not Dead, I'm in Pittsburgh

Well, at least I was. After our first road trip to Pennsylvania to visit amusement parks, we did another one this past weekend, going to Kennywood. The name is kind of confusing because Dollywood exists, but it had that name for more than thirty years before Kenny Rogers was born. Beth had been wanting to go since childhood, when she saw a documentary film called Kennywood Memories, which she showed me a few weeks ago. It was made in the eighties, so obviously some things have changed since then, but many were still there. I hadn't been in western Pennsylvania since graduating from college, and I very briefly considered visiting my old school, but it was out of the way and I don't know what I would have done there anyway. We did stop to see Beth's relatives who had bought a bed and breakfast, where they still live, but they don't take guests anymore. We spent Friday night at a motel, then drove to the park on Saturday morning.

We were able to go on most of the rides we were interested in, the main exception being a roller coaster called the Skyrocket that's right near the entrance, but we decided to save for later. This is one of those parks that closes everything before the official closing time, so we ended up not being able to. The first thing we rode was the Old Mill, a classic dark ride that's been changed a few times. For a while, it was Garfield-themed. Currently, it tells the story of a skeleton in the Old West, complete with appropriate music. The skeleton's name is Harold, which is my dad's name, and that made it more entertaining. There are three wooden coasters, the Jack Rabbit, the Racer, and the Thunderbolt.

It's a little confusing when parks give different rides the same names. Clementon Park also had an old wooden coaster called the Jackrabbit, but it wasn't the same. And I've seen Thunderbolt used for the ride that's like the Musik Express except the cars are suspended, and a relatively new coaster at Coney Island that neither of us have ridden yet. The Racer runs two trains at once, and they end up on opposite sides during the course of the ride. I'm sure it's based on a simple principle, but I haven't looked into how it works.

Phantom's Revenge was originally the Steel Phantom, but was renamed in 2001 after significant renovations. I'm not entirely sure what the Phantom is getting revenge for, but there you go. Another coaster, the Steel Curtain, is themed around the Steelers.

I'm not a sports guy at all, but it was amusing that they had sportscasters doing the safety announcement. That one has a really steep first hill. The Exterminator is a Crazy Mouse sort of ride, but indoors and largely in the dark. It was a lot rougher than I expected.

By the way, it's not far from the Black Widow (not affiliated with the Marvel character), so I suspect the Exterminator isn't doing their job. The Whip and the Turtle were both installed in the 1920s.

The former has sixteen cars instead of the twelve I've seen on other Whips, and is out in the open air.

The Turtle was originally the Tumble Bug, which used to be a pretty standard ride but is now the only one still operating. What's less old is the sample of Dana Carvey saying "turtle" that they play during the ride. Also worthy of note is Noah's Ark, which is a walkthrough but presumably still counts as a ride because the boat park rocks back and forth.

You enter through a whale's mouth, and there are a lot of animal props, as well as some trick floors. According to the documentary, the air jets were originally installed to blow up women's skirts, but I'm not sure that would be legal anymore, even though I doubt too many people still wear skirts to amusement parks. The park has two kiddie sections, Kiddieland with smaller versions of the classic rides, and Thomas Town that's based on Thomas the Tank Engine. They made a big deal in the film of the Potato Patch, which sells fresh-cut French fries with various toppings. The wait for this was worse than most of the rides. Aside from that, Beth had a corn dog and a funnel cake, and I had a stromboli and a water ice.


After leaving the park, we went into Pittsburgh to ride something else, the two inclines on Mount Washington. We parked into a garage for the Monongahela, and a lot for the Duquesne. There might have been a lot for the former, but I didn't think to look for it before driving there.

Called funicular railways, they counterbalance by having one car coming down the track while the other is going up. The gift shops weren't open when we got there, but I noticed that some of the merchandise for the Duquesne Incline had a cute anthropomorphic version of the car.

I'll admit to having a rather irrational fear of heights, but only when I can really process them, so not on roller coasters or planes or anything. I'm less afraid that I'll fall than that I'll drop something. But I did get some pictures of Pittsburgh from above, including the confluence of the three rivers.

We spent that night at my dad's house, which he just bought last year. The next day, my brother and his wife and son were over at my dad's for a little while, and I finally got to give them the Christmas presents I'd bought months ago. Then we met my mom and sister for dinner at a place called Snap Custom Pizza in Exton, where they'll make a pizza to order, sort of like a Subway sandwich.

I have to go back into the office full-time on Monday, which is annoying. I don't have any particular safety concerns, but since working from home was apparently effective for a while, why is it necessary? I've heard something about wanting to justify the cost of the subways, so if that's the reason, I guess it ultimately comes down to money over people. I suppose I should be glad that this was delayed for over a year, but it just feels like a case where we're given a better option, then it's taken away with no given reason.